these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
