Kiss
Puke
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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