i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize