Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize