Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
This house was built for laser tag.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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