Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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