He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
