so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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