We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
