the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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