Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
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were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
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You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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