actually, I'm a sock model
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize