who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
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I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
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I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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