its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize