VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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