We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
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Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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