I'm drive I can fine osifer
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
