hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
we're so committed to being not committed
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
