Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
