Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
They took my balls.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize