I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
