does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
