To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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