Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
