We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
