Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize