Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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