sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
