Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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