I want to make a zoo with you.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize