In the future we'll all be gay
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
