so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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