Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
