I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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