Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
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Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
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I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have feelings that need drinking.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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