all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
