Don't you send me to vm
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
