I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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