Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
