do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
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the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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