We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
