please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
