Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize