You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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