yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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