got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize