I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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