Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
