My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
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No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
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I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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