Texts From Last Night

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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.

  (1-623): View more from Arizona

  Where are you?

  (623): View more from Arizona

  A place I should not be.

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  (623): Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors. (1-623): Where are you? (623): A place I should not be. http://tfl.nu/jfq9
  Replies (19) Good night (3745) Bad night (541)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.

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  (708): I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event. http://tfl.nu/286m
  Replies (6) Good night (3487) Bad night (412) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me

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  (978): we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me http://tfl.nu/ax47
  Replies (12) Good night (3101) Bad night (472) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from England

  phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...

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  (+44): phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that... http://tfl.nu/hzwk
  Replies (25) Good night (4601) Bad night (758) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.

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  (518): She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change. http://tfl.nu/rlg4
  Replies (16) Good night (1744) Bad night (5637) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.

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  (203): I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore. http://tfl.nu/i7wi
  Replies (19) Good night (3716) Bad night (996) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something

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  (917): Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something http://tfl.nu/o4s2
  Replies (7) Good night (3789) Bad night (1045)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  bloody. ill be home soon.

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  (215): so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know? (267): bloody. ill be home soon. http://tfl.nu/2ypq
  Replies (7) Good night (3624) Bad night (906)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?

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  (781): Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink? http://tfl.nu/6hyx
  Replies (6) Good night (2095) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.

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  (443): The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook. http://tfl.nu/hkf6
  Replies (6) Good night (1445) Bad night (859) Order T-Shirt
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  (424): View more from California

  You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.

  (1-424): View more from California

  The hell is wrong with me

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  (424): You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks. (1-424): The hell is wrong with me http://tfl.nu/smgq
  Replies (4) Good night (1072) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off

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  (360): I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off http://tfl.nu/h8mk
  Replies (11) Good night (2088) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.

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  (904): She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes. http://tfl.nu/nuhm
  Replies (2) Good night (741) Bad night (401) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.

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  (918): Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time. http://tfl.nu/hv9q
  Replies (1) Good night (520) Bad night (263) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.

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  (303): It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple. http://tfl.nu/6uwz
  Replies (1) Good night (366) Bad night (157) Order T-Shirt

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