Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.

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  (207): it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck. http://tfl.nu/q2n8
  Replies (80) Good night (932) Bad night (5894)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.

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  (847): I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever. http://tfl.nu/o6xg
  Replies (31) Good night (693) Bad night (5342)
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  (949): View more from California

  we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds

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  (949): we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds http://tfl.nu/xoyy
  Replies (12) Good night (650) Bad night (3167)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf

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  (905): No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf http://tfl.nu/d4pp
  Replies (8) Good night (865) Bad night (3875)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.

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  (239): You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house. http://tfl.nu/7m77
  Replies (8) Good night (4137) Bad night (874)
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  (559): View more from California

  Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?

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  (559): Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room? http://tfl.nu/fqub
  Replies (10) Good night (2315) Bad night (1006)
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  (714): View more from California

  I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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  (714): I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later. http://tfl.nu/riev
  Replies (17) Good night (1995) Bad night (2393)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.

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  (706): Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon. http://tfl.nu/nu6w
  Replies (18) Good night (1335) Bad night (1750)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th

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  (201): I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th http://tfl.nu/okx6
  Replies (4) Good night (1752) Bad night (474)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day

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  (701): When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day http://tfl.nu/f44m
  Replies (2) Good night (970) Bad night (381)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I was emotionally compromised.

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  (615): Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really? (423): I was emotionally compromised. http://tfl.nu/irpq
  Replies (1) Good night (763) Bad night (429)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles

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  (434): After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles http://tfl.nu/5yst
  Replies (6) Good night (916) Bad night (467)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.

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  (219): I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying. http://tfl.nu/c4tp
  Replies (4) Good night (1481) Bad night (654)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?

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  (262): Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore? http://tfl.nu/hk51
  Replies (2) Good night (480) Bad night (384)
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  (707): View more from California

  Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.

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  (707): Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard. http://tfl.nu/vbbc
  Replies (2) Good night (519) Bad night (289)

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