Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(649): View more from Turks & Caicos

So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it

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(515): View more from Iowa

So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.

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(204): View more from Manitoba

between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...

(1-614): View more from Ohio

FUCK YOU.

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21 Reasons You’ll Be Forever Alone
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.

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(847): View more from Illinois

Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?

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(819): View more from Quebec

I woke up to her vacumming the grass

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(954): View more from Florida

I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.

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(571): View more from Virginia

All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.

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