Texts From Last Night

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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"

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  (412): Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****" http://tfl.nu/w62j
  Replies (34) Good night (3650) Bad night (633)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.

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  (716): I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom. http://tfl.nu/gtvn
  Replies (39) Good night (1150) Bad night (3945)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.

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  (936): You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that. http://tfl.nu/w7w8
  Replies (18) Good night (2146) Bad night (6667)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.

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  (765): Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom. http://tfl.nu/gaio
  Replies (32) Good night (3328) Bad night (5885)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.

  (419): View more from Ohio

  you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.

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  (740): new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner. (419): you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio. http://tfl.nu/k9v1
  Replies (27) Good night (4415) Bad night (989)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.

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  (317): He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/3k3l
  Replies (8) Good night (911) Bad night (3702)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious

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  (801): we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious http://tfl.nu/ejqb
  Replies (15) Good night (3901) Bad night (1605)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.

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  (814): Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now. http://tfl.nu/xg11
  Replies (16) Good night (6921) Bad night (2339)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...

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  (+44): The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad... http://tfl.nu/0y4t
  Replies (5) Good night (825) Bad night (2127)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.

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  (612): Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes. http://tfl.nu/p3u3
  Replies (3) Good night (2680) Bad night (886)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  You can't call dibs 8 years later.

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  (936): You can't call dibs 8 years later. http://tfl.nu/gnnz
  Replies (7) Good night (2483) Bad night (924)
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  (648): View more from

  Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.

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  (648): Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me. http://tfl.nu/1al0
  Replies (5) Good night (1306) Bad night (613)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Your topless pictures make me question reality

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  (815): Your topless pictures make me question reality http://tfl.nu/0lfq
  Replies (6) Good night (1016) Bad night (678)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.

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  (801): Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell. http://tfl.nu/ht90
  Replies (4) Good night (1269) Bad night (380)
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  (716): View more from New York

  It will be interesting

  (585): View more from New York

  Isn't that your life's motto?

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  (716): It will be interesting (585): Isn't that your life's motto? http://tfl.nu/w5i1
  Replies (1) Good night (503) Bad night (423)

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