I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize